How do I adapt to special occasions and holidays since I’ve become a caregiver?

Posted: December 8, 2014, 3:35PM

You are creating a new normal. Use the opportunity to establish new traditions that make your life less complicated.

*Shopping: Although you love the personal touch of shopping for someone, you may not be able to get out to do this. Try gift cards. You can also order on-line if you have access and are comfortable with on-line shopping. Many schools and non-profits offer coupon booklets for special offers and bogo dinners and meals.

*Decorating: Maybe this is the year to downsize the tree. Or, maybe it’s time for a beautiful artificial one that looks real and collapses into an easy-to-stow box. Simplify.

*Food: Assign appetizers, sides and desserts to other family members and you can bake the ham or the turkey. Many stores or restaurants will prepare the whole meal and all you have to do is pick it up.

*Let others help: When a friend asks “What can I do?” – Tell them! Keep a list of tasks that you are willing to let others help with. Give them a specific item. When we ask if we can help, we mean it! There are other services you can enlist to help: let the grocery store deliver the prescriptions, let the wrappers at the Mall take care of your packages. Bottom line – accept help!

*The care receiver: Try to include the care receiver in the activities. How much can they do? What are their strengths? Use those strengths to make them part of the festivities and preparation, and use those strengths to your advantage. Assign tasks that are adapted to the care receiver’s level of capability. It will help you and will add a sense of security and inclusion for your loved one.

Think safety! Watch extension cords. Don't set out things that the care receiver may eat such as potpourri, if this is an issue. Watch the temperature of foods for the care receiver. Breakable treasures may be best displayed out of reach or left packed safely away.

Know and NO your limits. If you can't do something, acknowlege it and say 'no'.

Caregiving is a job unto itself. It is NOT like taking care of a child. It has a price whether it’s psycho/emotional, physical, job-related or financial. The things you can do for yourself are to simplify, decrease the stress, make tasks less complex. Take care of yourself NOW. You can always go back to your old traditions. The thing to remember is ‘this too shall pass’.